just me? or is it reality?
Monday, July 30, 2007
♥ 5:50 pm
for the past half a year, i've been deluding myself.
how and why, it's only for me to know.
i thought i could handle
it, but i guess, like jethro said, time heals all wounds.
and in due time, my question will be answered.
i talked to people about
it, and i got mixed reactions. some good, some bad, but all for the aim of making me feel better. thanks guys.
(:i just realised i haven't emailed SSMO yet. shit.i guess
it shouldn't have started at all. i mean, what would have happened if i didn't know that person?
maybe i'll just be much happier, finding greatest pleasures in the simplest things. take for example jason's aka VP 'song' with menveer's aka PRES hp no. together with the pizza hut jingle. now that got me laughing like mad. till i teared. till all of us had stomachaches.
of course,
things will either remain status quo, or get better.
no prizes for guessing which i'm hoping for.
but i guess, it's just time that has made the feeling die down.
whose fault is it exactly, i'm not sure.
all i know is, sometimes i wish i'd known that person later in my life.
i'll probably have much less to worry about.
i do have regrets, but no point looking back. i should think positive.
no matter what the outcome, i promise, i'll be fine.
i'll emo for a day or two, then i'll snap out of it.
meanwhile, i will channel all my energy into work.
and i shall be like my darling angel, be a feminist.
pro girl power.
thinking about
that happens very often, the first thing when i awake, the last thing before i enter a deep slumber. but honestly, just shrug it aside, and all will be well.
oh wells, i'm ranting too much. nothing is sounding coherent.
disclaimer: I AM NOT EMO NOW.
Blessing & Official Opening
Friday, July 27, 2007
♥ 10:45 pm
yesterday was a long looooooooong day.
but it was all worth my time. at least that was the case during the evening.
(:the blessing and official opening of CJ's PAC & LRC aka library went on without a glitch, and everything was beautiful, just perfect.
the prayer service was great. my partner in 'crime' aka audrey and i did really well at our
(only) hymn. nonetheless, nervous and scared as we were, we pulled it off and it sounded great! the projection of all our voices were great during the readings of the blessings/prayer. haha. the 15 min training with mr yeow really helped.
(:the concert ended the night with a bang. too bad i miss the guzheng performance. but all wasn't wasted when i managed to catch the item i'd been waiting for for a long time.....DANCE!
(: they did the SYF 2007 dance, for which they got a
gold (seriously, they're gold WITH HONOURS material) . so now, i'm in love with that dance. haha.
one regret: i didnt bring my camera.
so no memories
*ARGHH!!!* , but i found people with the video.
*marie's excited*
I love the arts
Sunday, July 22, 2007
♥ 3:32 pm
it's been 1 year 1 day since drama night at IJ. oh how i miss it. the pre drama night excitement, and the post drama night, drama. haha. and it was also sis' debut performance then. as an anorexic. what an unglam role. haha.
i like this photo. it was taken at drama night last year. haha. wanted to submit it for CJ arts week but oh well. haha.
the arts is one of the single most beautiful things that exists. haha. music, dance, drama, all of which i love. haha. what about pursuing a career in the arts? probably not an option for me. what about immersing myself into the arts? haha. i'll probably get too distracted and abandon my studies. i can only enjoy it in my own free time. while putting my studies as top priority.
*grumbles*somehow my attempt to get involved in the arts in school has be quite unsuccessful. choir and dance auditions = failed. guitar = quit cos of council.
(no regrets being in council cos really, it's fun and i like it.) so now i can only serve and do my part for the arts through council. CA music!!
(:this is a random post. somewhat proclaiming my love for the arts. haha.
it can only get better.
the perfect prince charming
Friday, July 20, 2007
♥ 8:47 pm
szeching wrote this on her blog. or rather posted this on her blog. it's so sweet, i felt i should steal it from her and post it here.
*no offence ching ching!!*Every girl dreams that one day she will find a guy that does these things for her.
Even the smallest action can have the BIGGEST impact in someone's life.
THIS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER
(:~give her one of your t-shirts to sleep in
~leave her cute text notes
~kiss her in front of your friends
~tell her she looks beautiful
~look into her eyes when you talk to her
~let her mess with your hair
~touch her hair
~just walk around with her
~FORGIVE her for her MISTAKES
~look at her like she's the only girl you see
~tickle her even when she says stop
~hold her hand when you're around your friends
~when she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her
~let her fall asleep in your arms
~ get her mad, then kiss her
~stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything
~tease her and let her tease you back
~stay up all night with her when she's sick
~watch her favorite movie with her
~kiss her forehead
~give her the world
~let her wear your clothes
~when she's sad, hang out with her
~let her know she's important
~kiss her in the pouring rain
~when you fall in love with her, tell her
~and when you tell her, love her like you've never loved someone before
these are everything a girl wants from her prince charming.
33rd SC Installation!!
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
♥ 5:08 pm
finally, the long wait is over. installation was held ytd, and like everyone else, it was a total blast for me.
simply put, the 2 friends who i invited turned up
*thankfully!! omg.* and it was great to finally see them again
(one of them since march and another just 2 weeks) ahh...may i say the feeling i felt yesterday was just exhilarating.
the whole ceremony was in the form of a prayer service at the beautiful st ignatius church, as with all other ceremonies. i did the scripture reading, which sis said sounded like i had a breaky voice. my friend missed it cos he was glamourously late with the rest of his crew. haha.
(they claimed they missed the boring part, of which i dont feel obliged to comment on) there were also hymns and the badges thing thing and photo taking aka cam whoring
(which made me feel as if i was viciously hounded by the paparazzi). nothing too special for a ceremony like this. all in all, i enjoyed myself thoroughly, and i'm sure many others did.
sai kang work is just starting. but like pix
(my LTC facil) said, the end product is heaven though the process is hell. haha. how funny, and how ironic.
marie was a happy girl yesterday.
oh how did she fear the worst? *inside thing*photos will come soon. haha.
(:
#130
Friday, July 13, 2007
♥ 8:50 pm
contrary to my previous 2 posts (or more, i can't rmb), i'm feeling much better. really.
i guess being preoccupied with other stuff, like council and school and all that crap (not rubbish, not trash) really helps take my mind off the bad and sad things.
to all those who helped make me feel better, thank you so much. i really appreciate your care and concern, cos it means so much to me.
this week has been interesting. how so, i guess i shall not elaborate here. but it's funny, to the extent of being weird.
mid year results were finally out this week. i passed everything, thankfully. but i know i could have done better. much MUCH
MUCH better according to mrs loke, esp for maths. like duh, i am totally disappointed with maths. so close to a distinction. arghh. chem totally sucked. my marks i mean. lowest of all my subjects. it wasnt shocking at all, after all, chem totally killed me. physics was a pleasant surprise, while GP and econs were rather expected. well, i wasnt expecting much, considering i havent put in my heart and soul into my work. this is definitely a wake up call,
a call to be a better student, a better person, and a better me.
pictures paint a thousand words.
Monday, July 09, 2007
♥ 4:28 pm
this picture is so apt. it totally describes how i feel. and i though i needed to remind myself about it.
looks like pictures indeed speak a thousand words.
oh how true can that be.
i guess only time will tell.
ps:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD!
when there's nothing worse, there will be no best.
Sunday, July 08, 2007
♥ 11:11 am
thanks kaichuen for the quote. it really makes hell a lot of sense.
070707- the day i felt as if it was the lowest point of my life.
maybe i should go buy 4-D. and that number will win 1st prize.
no i'm kidding.
but am i exaggerating?
seriously, the feeling i felt the whole day, was that the world seemed to come crashing down on me.
it was caused by a whole string of events, events that at this point, i wish, never ever happened to me.
at least i could confide with my girlfriends. hell yeah, heart-to-heart really helps. talking to guin, soon-li and mel relieved my sorrows. and meeting joyce at the youth rally also somewhat cheered me up.
the youth day rally 07 made me better. at least i know that there's someone who's always there for me. and i know now that i'm only a lowly creature, a creature that is still loved so much my the
big papa up there.
right now, i just wanna cry. lock myself in a room and cry my heart out.i think i will emerge with eyes as swollen as the universe, and as a stronger person.
2007 hasn't been a good year so far. no way. no where near last year.
if only it took a turn for the better.
why me? why is it that i meet people who are so nice but only end up somewhat as a disappointment?
i feel as if i was brought on a joy ride for 1 whole year.
only to find out, it was only a dream.
i felt misled. brought to a whole new dimension, coming out and realising that it was only an illusion.
WAKE UP MARIE. *slaps myself*i'm not saying that i don't have any blame in this. cos i admit, and i proclaim that i hold some responsibility.
if i could turn back the clock, i will do things differently, speak of other things, and react to situations differently.
but it is without these tribulations that one grows as a stronger person.
it will be a learning point.
and i will not make an
ass out of
u and
me.
now i truly know what will really mark the highest point of my life.
my list:
1. 4/1!
2. SSMO!
3. IJ!
4. my family!
5.
big papa!
for now, i will be the best person i can be.
good day vs bad day
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
♥ 2:24 pm
yesterday was a good day. or rather i had a good time with the few 4/1ers at ps.
and i was totally satisfied with all the jewelry-making materials i got from spotlight. most a discount.
*wide smile*eunice decided to take up knitting, and it was hilarious at how she went around spotlight searching for her required materials and other stuff.
spotlight clearance sale makes marie & eunice happy girls. truly happy girls.
so now i'm looking forward to the day when i have enough money to splurge on materials. and the day that i'll go shopping for supplies with eunice.
however, starting in the evening, things just pissed me off. made me upset. and made me pro-girl power.
*no offence to those who haven't got on my nerves*THAT PERSON brushed me off. again. the umpteenth time in the last few months. THAT PERSON has been the same way it's been for the past few months. empty promises and false hopes, that's all that i've gotten. dont make me have false impressions and high expections when nothing good that i've ever hoped for came out of it. is it THAT PERSON's ego, or is it truly what's been going on now?
the bad spell continued to today.
1. chem prac. not surprisingly, i screwed it up. i didnt add enough solution. and i forgot to do so many things. and my statements are probably wrong too. at least not what i'd memorised. something i'd just improvised.
2. my new earring broke. wow.
3. econs proj. just basically came to a consensus that we should just bullcrap the whole way through. so the write-up is due tmr, so i've got today to rush it out, and i hope i'll write something presentable.
4. home. got a drink and toppled it. yeah. whole cup of home-made barely gone. just like that. had to wipe it up. one less cup of drink.
that's the bad day.
still got to go back to school for assembly training later. but i can look forward to heart-to-heart talk with clare!!
I *heart* music & lyrics!
Sunday, July 01, 2007
♥ 6:21 pm
MUSIC & LYRICS was an NICE NICE NICE NICE SHOW!
mum rented the dvd for the weekend, so i finally got to watch the movie- something that i'd wanted to watch since it came out on v-day. furthermore the storyline connects so well with my passion for music.
(:hugh grant and his beautiful british accent and humour throughout the show coupled with drew barrymore and her ranting = incredible lyrics and exggeration
(not that of a drama queen) made the show even more entertaining.
alex fletcher aka hugh grant:
'you and me' rhymes with 'autopsy'sophie fischer aka drew barrymore:
' you and me' matched with 'love autopsy'see what i mean?
the songs were so nice, i can't stop listening to it. trust me, they're addictive. haha. talk about 1980s PoP.
*watch the show to get the hint*so dad's gonna get me the dvd instead of just the soundtrack.
*marie gleams widely*can't wait!
Way Back Into Love- Haley Bennet & Hugh Grant[Cora]
I've been living with a shadow overhead
I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on
[Alex]
I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need them again someday
I've been setting aside time
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind
[Cora & Alex]
All I wanna do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
Oh oh oh
[Cora]
I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I've been searching but I just don't see the signs
I know that it's out there
There's gotta be something for my soul somewhere
[Alex]
I've been looking for someone to shed some light
Not somebody just to get me through the night
I could use some direction
And I'm open to your suggestions
[Cora & Alex]
All I wanna do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart again
I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end
[Cora]There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspirationNot just another negotiation
[Cora & Alex]
All I wanna do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart to you
I'm hoping you'll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again
You know that
I'll be there for you in the end
